Dear baby,
ii never would've fathomed you wouldn't be here with me
in this time of need.
& unto you ii thought life was blessed.
God, mommy stays stressed.
& she wished so much she had you in her life
to be the light & insight
by simple smiles & sticky fingers all over the place.
ii never got the chance to look at your face.
ii faded fast after the loss of blood, but ii knew you were beautiful because you came from your daddy & ii.
Some nights ii lay in bed & cry
because you aren't here.
& it really feels as if ii grow a little weaker each year
on the day that you would've been born.
ii just know that you would've taken my world by storm.
The moment ii found out ii was carrying you ii called the lady
that would've been your Mi-Mi
& cried, thinking ii was too young
& dumb
to take care of another life - ii was only sixteen.
Clueless & naive - No experience - The scene
of motherhood was a little much.
But in a couple of months
ii laid your daddy's hand on my tummy, face filled with happy tears, because ii felt you moving inside me & ii realized
that mine & daddy's lives
were about to change.
Things couldn't stay the same
because ii was going to have a beautiful baby boy in less than three months away.
ii'M sorry daddy lost his patience & pushed mommy & ii pray
that you come to me in the form of another life someday.
So that ii can soothe you when you're upset, kiss your pain away, & have the oppurtunity to watch you grow.
So, baby, just so you know
even if God chose to take you from me -
ii loved you oh so dearly.
Love, unconditionally - Mommy.