Better In Time - Leona Lewis


I am getting use to the fact that when i awake
you are not on the pillow next to me
but......
sometimes in the middle of the night.....
no matter how hard i try to fight it
I
still reach out for you...missing your warmth
you strong touch
gentle kisses
senseless 3 A.M conversations(lol)
But...
then i think
about the constant text messages to her
telling her things that only should be said to me
the constant downing of me every time you
were caught up in reality
that you too were like the rest that came to me
cheat..lie..then flip the script to make me feel low
still....
i would deal with a cheater and liar if it meant...
i would not have to go through this world alone
so tall i stood..pride still pumped thru my veins
then....
I think back to the night
when she announced
that you and her
exchanged bodies time after time
and to think you came home to me
layed in bed with me
and held me
knowing...
you were doing me wrong
constantly making love to me
knowing....
you probably did the same things to her
maybe even the night before...
but still....
my heart beats
stomach flutters
and cheeks flush
when i think of you
i hate to admit it but i still love you
i want you(at times)
but no longer feel i need you
i miss you
but dont want to be played by you
so i let go of any thoughts
of the love we shared
allow pictures to blow into the wind...
memories fade into darkness
i really love you....
and have since
you first came to my door in 03
but...
i just cant let anyone else take my kindness for weakness
and although i really love you
i deserve someone who is really down for me
someone who i can shed tears for
but wont make me cry
my heart is slightly broken but it can only
get better with time