How do I live without her?

Please help me: Memories are the enemy..Holding deep "tears of frustration" and regrets.. ALWAYS, keeping in mind the mistakes and rejection extended is my own blame..
Now as unconscious overtake presence, her strength was like no other: As it carried me without question,fight, or concern.. How she lifted me up and kept me warm when the sun was long gone.. Her words and thoughts was like a magnet of ecstasy that surrounded me.. Her protection for me against this world of cruel and unusual punishment was like a waterfall emptying into a sea of paradise.. Her acceptance was so tightly sealed, just like a virgins first time.. She took the ultimate leap into the abyss of chances and vulnerability, BUT, I turned her away..

Her trusting nature was like a wounded animal,out of options, hoping for help.. Her body was as the Goddess of Absolute as she skipped to the rhythm of our beats.. Her temperament is like a point of emotional paradise where only fictional characters reach.. Her attitude was as sharp as a razor that could only produce independence.. Her respect was like a violin play with crisp and precise notes that constructed a foundation of pure loyalty..Her Enthusiasm to please was like the perfect companion.. Her lips was like an explosion of the twin towers that fell on that dreadful (911) day..BUT, I turned this away..

Her eyes was as soft as a warm summer breeze at the beach.. Her charisma was like a bright light that guided my direction daily.. Her skin reminded me of an ocean of coco butter..Her love was so deep for me that she blamed herself for my short-comings..Simply Amazing--How it took her to free up out my life before I took a look in the mirror at myself..

"I WAS THE WEED THAT CHOKED THIS MAGNIFICENT ROSE"--with my pride, ego, and bull-shit..I am the uncleaned spirit that haunted the rays of forgiveness.. My back was the image extended to her cries for affection..My ignorance to her undying, unfailing love has cost me a possible life-time of aloneness..