I just feel so lost in this house that we claim to call home
I know that your sitting right there yet, I feel all alone

You leave such a void but I pretend that I'm all filled up
So I continue to poor this vodka in my tall pink cup

Hoping for that feeling to meet me at the bottom of that bottle
Hoping for love and passion to come at me FULL THROTTLE

But I am deceived because all my hopes are just a mirage
Still as I'm with my friends I try to put on this facade

Don't want them to know that my life is so not all that I pretend it to be
Don't want them to know how you use double standards with me

So I hold all these feelings and realities inside
I contemplate on my next verse I am going to write

Espressing the truth and finding comfort in something as simple as paper and pen
Hopeing this way I can heal before I commit a fatal sin

Given you all I can thinkg of yet you tell me it's not enough
Even words I express of encouragement, but you fail to give me your trust

We try to move on as if nothing has taken place
Telling me that you're tired, tired of even seeing my face

Betrayel, that's what I feel cause you promised me though thick and through thin
When the thick comes around though I'm your enemy instead of your friend

Wanting you to be my inspiration of all the good in my life
You've become my inspriration but for feelings of pain and strife

I just long to be that comfort in your mind
Give you releif in so many ways and give you love of all kinds

Instead my offering is nothing but denied
Last nigh as I thought about this I placed my hands in my face and I cried

It helped only a little cause the hurt is still there
It's only a little because of the depth of that pain that I bare

Thought love was suppose to bring nothing but tears of joy
Instead I've experienced heartache cause my heart has become a toy

Thrown here and thrown there as if it could never fall and break
But I feel as if my heart has been ran through with a stake.