Maybe I am just misunderstood..
cus when I dont mean anything by what I may have said..
it is taken the wrong way.

When I think I have found a good approach to break something down
Its the wrong thing and it aint work the way intended.
sighs..
I dont know what to do...
Emotions all over the place
Trying to maintain myself

Did I do the right thing today by bringing her stuff back to her
Because in the end I did miss a very important appointment for the baby..
She diidnt care, but I didnt want to start something today
That may have been held against me Monday when she was needed
or next week at an appt, or when the weekend comes along either..

sighs..

Decisions..am I making the right ones?
I can only make the ones I feel are best and then hope they work out
for the best in the end.

*deep Breath*

I am trying to smile
when inside I want to cry
I am trying to be strong
When inside I feel weak
I am trying to maintain
When inside I am unorganized and a mess..emotionally
Mentally drained
But I need to suck it up and just know that
All of this sufferering and being talked to any kind of way
is only short lived..
I am counting down until we are MIA.. and out of her life for good
I wont look back cus this time around.. when I really needed her to not stress
She did.. and could have stopped and realized there was a child involved
ANOTHER LIFE
she didnt care or want to change her outlook on things..
so I did the best I could to regain a relationship with her..
Over and beyond what someone in their right mind may have taken..
and for a much longer time frame...lol..
Its ok.. bcus I know that I am still a good person in the end
and I have my family and I am loved.

Im good now..

Im at Peace..