I'm not sure who I am anymore ...

for many of the things that once brought me such joy
feel as though they have lost much appeal
and the heart once bursting with love
has slowly evolved into cold steel

it seems that many of the things
I used to love to do again and again

now I can almost go without doing them at all
for days and days on end

I know that I have changed, and gracefully
I accept that change is a part of me
in simply being true to myself
though most change was for the better
I am not always satisfied with what I see

often I reflect upon choices I've made
or a particular path I may have chosen

in order in decipher any possible reason
why it appears that every burning desire I use to have seems frozen

I search every crevice of my mental
for answers that may not exist
I search everywhere in the physical to try to put my finger on it

why my desire to inspire seems stagnant
and my will to be creative lie dormant

I'm not sure who I am anymore
I feel almost as if I am losing myself
where is one to go now

I know my gift:
to fuse together a few verbs and pronouns
to provoke thought with words
cleverly crafted into something unique and profound

however ...

when words are one of the few things you have left
and even that seems to leave you
where do you go now?

when you have so much to say
but simply do not know how?

damn....

You see....

A long time ago
before i thought I knew who I was
I thought I knew what I wanted to be

and that has changed many times since I was a youngster
yet remained the same to some degree

DO NOT MISINTERPRET THIS AS A CRY FOR HELP
because truly... it is NOT
it's simply something to unleash frustrations
allowing myself to in a sense be free mentally

for you see there is one person I have to get it together for .....











ME