Patience was something I never had.
I learned that in the penitentiary,
My new ways were given to me by new
Dad.
Three years was what I willingly gave up.
Sitting in my cell looking at the mirror
Thinking like...
What the fuck!!!
How am I going to flip the game?
Once I leave this bitch
I know in my heart
I won't ever be the same.
I opened up the Bible
Looking for another way.
Knowing damn well once I was out
I was going to push His hands away.
I went to different classes
Because I had to play it smart.
I traded in my street clothes for all whites.
It was time for a new start.
Old school cats serving 15 to 30 years.
I never complained about my time in the pen.
We held our pictures close to us and fought back
Our tears...
Losing someone close to us
Was our only fear.
Visitation came...
Damn, my little girl had grown.
At the end of our conversation
I always would tell her I loved her
And that I had to hang up the phone.
It really hurts to hear your family say
Goodbye and walk away.
But as a inmate
The only thing we can do is be strong
And hope for better days.
One year has passed
And it seems like I won't ever make it home.
I gotten to use to this place
It feels like I made it my own.
I ran into old faces that had drama
With me on the streets.
It's funny to see fear in their eyes
Once they knew they were about to
Get there ass beat.
I seen a man get shanked for walking
In front of a T.V.
He had to been at least 60 years old.
They beat him so bad
The guards moved him out to
P.C.
Respect is everything
So you have to be ready to hold
Your ground.
I got "Death Before Dishonor," tatted on my
Back.
So people knew what I was about
When I came around.
I started to mark off my calendar
Putting an X through everyday.
January 1st was year number two
For me.
It was just another day like the holidays.
I had just turned 23 and my mind had
Got a lot stronger.
My patience was about to hit below zero.
But there was God
Telling me to hold on just a little bit longer.
My mom shot me a letter
Telling me how close I am on getting out.
She told me, "one more year son"
And I responded by saying...
Yeah mom, but I have a lot of things
To figure out.
Like how am I suppose to make an honest
Living?
I got three felonies on my record now
The only career I have a chance at
Is stealing.
Society is going to make me into a label.
When I sleep at night
I have great dreams of making it
But I wake up
And it's all a fable.
I don't want to be rich
I just want to be able to say that I'm
Stable.
So called friends will come back
But they proved to be made out of
Plastic.
One thing I learned in here was
To understand the purpose of the snake
And watch out for its tactics.
I prayed to God and asked Him if my
Future was going to be bright.
I had too much darkness surrounding
Me at the moment.
I was the blunt that wanted the light.
January 1st 2003
I finished my two year sentence
They were going to let me go...
But not not yet free.
I have a year left to do Federal
Then we will see...
If God's allowment of prison over
Death
Was the best choice for me.
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