About Me:
I have been through a lot, but who hasn't? I have been on a journey to find myself for quite some time and thought that I had, until I got into a very heavy, passionate, and all consuming relationship. Before him, I was a serial dater and dated one bad guy after another..the types of guys that treat women like objects and don't know the worth of another human being. Dealing with them was painful enough, but I was still ME. Independant, somewhat hardened towards men and I didn't believe in lasting love. When I finally decided to break down my walls and allow myself to truly love someone back, that's when I felt the greatest feeling a person can feel. It is UNREAL, the power of true, lasting love. The pain involved in that kind of love is even more UNREAL.. I never thought I could feel the highs and lows I've experienced over the past few years. I will also never regret a single moment of pain or joy because this has given me a far greater understanding of the world in which we live. The only problem is, being consumed with this kind of love is almost core shaking, and it sometimes causes you to lose yourself in the union. I have been physically detached from him for a few months but emotionally I still live in our world. It was almost impossible to picture a world without him because I altered my entire reality for he and I to be together. And now I have to come back to the land of the living because he and I will never be able to work it out. We both have cried one tear too many and I most likely will never be able to feel the same with him. At least not for a few years, and who knows where I'll be by then. I just hope this experience with him does not close me off to the idea of letting anyone else enter my life. The walls around me are very high and I pray to God that one day my thoughts won't be consumed with his image. So..I found this site and hopefully, by writing again I'll find myself again..and get back to the independant strong person I can be..
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Commented on the poem "Foolish Heart" on 02/02/09 at 11:30 PM
