A few Pushes
A few Breathes
Then im in the world
the doctors awe at my cuteness
and whisper
its a gurl
Growing up with mom and dad
protecting me from all thats bad..
Dad really wasnt around much..
but his love seem to have that special touch
which reached my tiny heart
Mom basicly Raised me..
Alone..but she was very strong
She Protected the home..
and most of all Me
At age 6..
Dad was wiped off the map Completely
but i make up thoughts of him ..to member sweetly
Since i dont remember much of him
i cant say that im hurt..or depresssed that he died..
but..im not happy or glad cuz till this day i still cry
at night with my lamp light
lookin at pictures of him holdin me
such a sweet sight
but when my tears have dried..
i smile...because i know im not alone
i feel his presence roam
at night through my home
and inside my dome..
he's still here with me..watchin over me
With that thought im content..
But still my live continues..
So lemme tell you about the next event
Family..was hectic..we never got along
this cousin hated this cousin and so on
so my dads side of the family and my moms side of the family
really didnt chill togetha
they'd say hey..bye and what eva
I use to chill with my sister
when i was about 10
we were at her friends house..he was a man
when my sister went outside..to get something from the car..
the man touched me inappropriately
i was affraid i was scared and i wanted to leave
tellin was the hard part..Because usually wat happens usually i keep between me and me
when i did tell..the man blamed it on achohol..which made my mom drop the subject
and now everytime i see him..i feel hate
now when we go places me my sis and him i barely participate
Now its takes me To the Present
diagnosed with cancer something hard to take
lightly..i...still cant believe the cancer got me..
but..im fine with it..i know im gunna die so..
as i say it... it slowly sinks into my head..
which makes it easier to hear when its said..
So and So died of cancer..
even though i switch the channel
because its hard to handle..
im..learning to accept it..
and even though its been my secret for a while..
i realize i just told it to the net..World Wide..
and im completely fine..



Written: 6/17/09 @ 7:08pm