Once I held a heart
So tight
I almost held it forever
But I felt
It slip through my fingers
As I wanted it so badly
I could taste it
Savor its flavor
On the tip of my existence
Who I thought I was
What I thought I needed
Was she
The one for me
Could it be
It was wrong to hold on
For so long
The nine years
I waited for the moment
That would tell me
This is perfect
.
.
.
.
It never came
And now I wonder if it ever will
I know ill never be the same
Because I know
Of having lost
Love
In the beginning
I never knew
What I wanted
So I held things that were
Not suppose to
Happen
And I let them happen
As I do
Now
With emotion
Trying to feel
Something
From anyone
And yet im still without
The feeling
Of being
Together
Im just walking around
Lost
In distress
Sending out my
S.O.S.
In hopes
I might find another
Stranded on an island
That knows my pain
Of having to let go
Of the things that are not ok
A false sense of unity
Only because
I felt I needed it
The hardships
Troubles
Hurt
I feel
Like I know
Them better then I should
So why do I
Still not feel any better
After letting go
Of the one thing I held close
For so long
Why
Does it not feel like
Love
Is
Love
At all
Cause I don’t feel like I belong
In this world
Cause
Cold
It’s the only temperature
I know
And the stress fractures
On my heart
Cant melt
To save this
.
.
.
.
.
Soul
Who is only looking for
Warmth
To hold
So close
That it melts away
My pain
And replaces my tears
With
Smiles
.
.
.
Knowing
Everything
Will
Be
Alright…..cause right now im not so sure