ITS LIKE IM CRYING IN THE INSIDE
BUT THEN AGAIN ITS LIKE NO ONE
HEAR ME NOT EVEN GOD
ITS LIKE MA HEARTS COLD AND LOST
IN THE LONLESS PART OF THE
WORLD
BUT SEE THATS NOT THE MOST PAINFUL PART
SEE I HAVE THESE PPL I THOUGHT I CUD GO TO
BUT I HAD TO THINK ABOUT IT DID THEY EVEN CARE
I GOT MA BABYDADDY MAD AT
ME CUZ THE RESPONSIBLITY OF RASING
A CHILD AT MA AGE
WUD BECOME TO MUCH FOR ME SO
NOW IM A MOTHER OF A DEAD BABY BUT LIKE
AS YOU CAN SEE NO ONE CARES ABOUT HOW I
FEEL THE PAIN THAT LIVES
WITHIN ME THE HURT
ITS LIKE NO ONES THERE AND
WHEN I WANNA LET IT ALL
GO I GET AFRAID AND THEN THATS
WHERE IT STAY
TRYNA TELL FAMILY WATS RITE
BUT ALL THEY THINK ABOUT IS MA
MISTAKES LIKE I CANT DO NUTHIN
GREAT BUT THATS OK I GUESS ITS LIKE
THERES NO ONE IN THE WORLD WHO UNDERSTAND LIVIN
LIFE KILLIN MASELF EACH DAY ACCORDING
TO MA MOMS
IT WUD HURT YOU TO HEAR THAT FROM YA MOM
IN FRONT OF THE CHURCH
TELLIN THEM THAT EACH DAY ALL YOU THINK ABOUT
IS YOUR BABY DYING
AND THE FACT THAT YA CHILD THINK THAT YOU DONT CARE
ABOUT THEM AND THAT THEY THINK THAT YOU DONT WANNA SEE THEM GO
THRU THE PAIN THAT YOU WENT THRU
STEADY TELLIN YA CHILD EACH DAY THEY DONT
TAKE THEIR
MEDS THEY ARE DYIN
AND THEN EACH DAY YO CHILD IS SICK WITH A BLOOD SUGAR OF 300 OR HIGHER
THAT THEIR KILLING THERE SELF EACH DAY
THAT EVRY TIME THAT CHILD FEEL DIFFERENT
AND THAT WHY CANT MY LIFE JUST B EASY LIK
EVRYONE ELSE THAT ALL THEY FEEL THEY CAN DO TO STOP THE PAIN
IS KILL THEIR SELF
CUZ THE FEEL THEY CAN'T GO TO ANYONE THEY KNOW CUZ IT WILL ONLY MAKE IT
WORSER BUT THEN YOU TELL THE ONE THAT YOU THOUGHT LOVE YOU AND WHEN THEY MAKE IT WORSE YOU JUST
SITTIN THERE FEELIN HURT IT LIKE WHEN YOUR CHILD IS WITHOUT A PARENT AND YOU JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO ITS LIKE A CHILD DYING OF THRUST AND HUNGER
BUT THEN AGAIN YOU SHOULD BE GREATFUL FOR THE LITTLE THINGS
HA THAT SEEM FINE BUT TO SOME PPL THEY'D SAY THAT ALL PPPLGO THRU THE
SAME SHYT WELL I'D SAY THAT
BUT THEN ITS LIKE WHEN OTHERS ARE HAPPI AND YOUR NOT ITS LIKE THEY DONT UNDERSTAND SO ALL YOU THINK
THAT'LL UNDERSTAND IS A KNIFE OR A GUN OR JUST BEIN HUNG
BUT WAIT NOT FOR THE FUN BUT BECUZ U
THINK THAT IF YOU RUN
EVRYTHING WANT BE DUN SO THE SUN
THAT ONCE SHUNE IS NOW
DUN DO TO THE POWER OF A GUN
BUT THEN IF THAT DONT WORK U
TURN TO SEX AND DRUGS PRAYIN TO GOD THAT ONE DAY
HE'LL PULL THE DAMN PLUG HOPIN
THATS THE PRAYER WILL GIVE HIM A TUG
BUT THEN YOU THINK TO YASELF
THATS THERE'S SO MUCH PAIN
AND SO MUCH HURT THAT IT
BECOMES HARD TO STAND ON 2 FEET
SO INSTEAD OF TRYNA GET IT RITE YOU GO
AND EITHER BECOME A DIKE THINK THAT ITS ALRITE
AND NOW THATS IF YOUR PAIN CAME FROM A MAN
BUT YOU KNOE THOSE TYPE OF PLANS WIT A
MAN AND THEN YOU BECOME LIKE SYLEENA JOHNSON
AND BECOME SO CONFUSE BUT THEN IF YOU'VE BEEN HURT LIKE RAPED
BY YOUR OWN BROTHER AND THEN HE TELLS YA
DAD THA HE ONLY SADI HE DID IT
TO STOP ANY FURTHER PROBLEMS WITH HIS LIL SISTER THAT HE'S SAPOSTA LOVE AND
PROTECT FROM MEN LIKE HIM AND THEN WAT'
WAS SO DAMN FUNNI THE DAY THAT IT HAPPEND
YA MOM WALK THE HOUSE WIT A GUT ASS FELLIN THAS SUMTHIN IS WRONG
AND CUDNT SLEEP CUZ YOU AND YOUR SISTERS WAS ON HER MIND
AND THEN THE FEAR OF IT HURT SO MUCH
U WAITED 8 MOS TO TELL YA MOM AND WHEN
U TOLD HER ALL YOU SEEN WAS THE TEARS FALL
BUT THEN AFTER U DO WATS RITE
YOUR DADY THAT LOVED YOU SO MUCH
STARTED TO HATE YOU CUZ YOU PUT HIS SON AWAY
AND THEN MORE AND MORE PAINFUL THINGS THAT YOU HAVE
GAINED COME AND YOUR MOM AND DAD ARGU ABOUT IT
ALWAYS AND ALL YOU DO IS CURL UP IN A BALL AND CRY BUT THEN
YOU LOOK AT ME AND SEE NUN OV IT CUZ A WEAR IT IN MA HEART WHEN IM MAD BUT THEN THATS JUST
YO STEP DAD AND BROTHER
SO WHEN IT COMES TO YOUR REAL DAD U NOT NUTHIN BUT A FAST
ASS LIL GURL TRYNA GET DICK AND SMOKE AND
DRINK AND GONNA HAVE 2 KIDS BYE THE TIME YOU 16 LOL
MIGHT B FUNNI NOW BUT YOU KNOW
THAT IS WAT YOU WHERE IN YA HEART UNTILL ONE DAY IT COMES OUT AND COME OUT SO BAD THAT
YOUR DAD GETS A DOSE OF REALITY AND
SEE HOW HE'S DUN HURT YOU AND THEN
HE LOOKS IN THE MIRROR AND IT HURTS HIM AND
THEN TELL ME THAT HE HATE ME BUT THEN TURN AROUND
AND SAY THAT HE LOVE ME BUT WHAT THE HELL AM
I SAPOSTA BELIVE GRADES DROPPIN IN SKOOL CUZ YOU WAS THE
SHYT BUT NOW YOU AINT WORTH SHYT AND ALL THE PPL LOOK AT
YOU LIKE YOUR JUST A NUMBER
AND THEN ALL YOU DO IS LIE YA WAY THRU LIFE
HOPING THAT ONE DAY THE TRUTH WILL COME OUT
AND THAT YOU'LL HAVE NO DOUBT
BUT........