Never has smoke filled my lungs.
Clouded my lungs with black mist
Yet today, I lit it up, inhaled and felt myself get lost
I told him to leave--just leave. No explaination.
Fuck you, I yelled. Bitch. He yelled.
I laughed, inhaled deeply, coughed. Inhaled again.
He screamed. I sat there. Inhaled again.
He slapped me. I laughed. This clown.
My cheek stung badly, My cig fell from my lips, sadly.
He called me names. From whore to slut
I sat there. I heard him. And I let it sink in.
He walked away. By the way I heard the bedroom door slam.
Never has alcohol stronger than wine touched these lips.
Walked over to the cupboard. Vodka. No chaser.
One shot, two shot, three. Am I free?
Four shot, five shot, six. I heard his voice echo. Bitch.
I lit up another one. Long draw. Menthol. I walked to the den
Held the cold steel in my hands and I smiled.
I walked to the bedroom, pushed th door opened slowly.
He watched me. I paced back and forth. Forth and back.
Raised the gun. Pulled the trigger. Twice maybe three times.
The sheets were covered, the wall, the headboard.
I sat on the edge of the bed, lit up again and smiled.