If you want to understand me please pay attention
I'm not a minister, here's divine and intervention
Sometimes I feel like the pain drops and hits me like the rain
Because I allow it all to hit, I'm being labeled insane
Tired of being shot down, put down and dissed
Wanted to be admired, held tight and kissed
Good things just don't come for guys like me
Me in a relationship that's unlikely
"You're too stiff, boring and just too plain
But I do like how you have a great brain"
Unusual gifts, poetry, chess and being depressed
I find it very funny how can I call that being blessed?
Only 3 phone calls in the last two weeks
If anything call me the definition of unique
A few, for years I have hung with and played
But stabbed me in the back cuz of rumors of me being gay
Questions like Why Basketball over malls and women?
I'm not really into fashion and I don't have chatting rhythm
Always see things different with my eyes
Dating back when neighbors hated, because I was a tall brown guy
But I still lived with innocence until proven guilty
Your all welcome to cleanse me if the mind is very filthy
But despite all the downplay, I find myself pleased
Because I've been myself the whole time even though it's displeasing
And increasing the judgments, the criticisms, the complaints
From others given to me, when in return I restrain
Other problems come and go and battle me for years
There are some even today that still give me tears
My grandmother died four years ago and it's sad
What a horrible grandson, ME, that she once had
I didn't even go to the hospital when she was sick
Didn't even know if she had just one dying wish
The only girl I cared about is so far away
The words "I love you" only reach halfway
3rd, 4th, and 5th grade, a stranger in the class
Because I was the only smart kid, with a dark skinned ass
If there's anything I've learned in my 20 years of life
There's no second chances time, doesn't count twice
So I continue on with the painfully driven
Conflicts being given to my existence as an intermission
I don't speak very much so depression is my voice
And if you wonder why, I don't think I ever had a choice