I was not born with this thing
Although I learned to wear it at a very young age
I can still remember a time when life was innocent
Oh so long a go that was
Some times I find those memories slipping away...


Slip... Slip...Slip...
Ben stop slurping!!!
Why? The Japanese do it... They say it helps them test the soup better
Well you are not Japanese and you are not in Japan
Slip....
Now stop

You need a hair cut
What do you mean I just got it cut last week
Besides I am growing it out...
It makes you look like a heathen
Now do you want people think that you are a heathen

When is the last time you shaved and cut your nail...
You’re starting to look like a Fu-Man-Chu
What dose that mean.....
You herd me! Now just go clean yourself up...

Yuck! What the hell are you eating...
What do you mean? It’s just noodles beef and tripe
I can’t believe you would eat the stomach of a cow....
That is so gross...