cut at the heart..
dissect the ventricle that carried ink spills
leaked my entrails full of stories and tribulations
hard to hide behind failed trails..
tried to let my words heal...
let my words feel the life im struggling to deal with
behind the ink..
behind the tears that smeared countless emotions..
behind the heart that broke stroking this next line..

I'm lost and confused trying to balance pain through hard times
so i abuse the ink to counteract my real fears
but my addiction hasn't appeared to cross over
so im...Breathing strong living in my words,,, but slowly dying in the real world
trying to break a stagnant life of flawless failures
how can my pen willingly inspire..
when the pathway to my heart is a continuous liar...as of yet
not even my own inspiration produced enough motivation for me to start a
Life of dedication...
to those who gave me enough fuel to fire a permanent change in my life.
this only gave me temporary stride to my swag...a life's hangover
could never recovery
relapsed and became the pens lover
but undercover
i was alone fighting demons that clawed at the foundation of my soul
so i rocked constantly...
but still bold enough to smile and hide my struggle from those...
honestly i felt it was a justified lie
why cry to other eyes..
when i can smile away your worry, and carry my own burden
me and my thoughts hurting...my pen still working
courage lurking but not brave enough to open my fight
shed light on why Ive been living in the dark
its hard to capture in words the disappointment i feel
It would be like Seeing God and still not believing he real
i try to fast forward, but my thoughts rewind..
so im stuck in time.. i gave away blessings and gifts..
now not even the Present is mine. How can i live right?
when im living in the wrong state of mind.
I cut up and dissected my own thoughts in hopes of recovering what Ive lost...
The answer is the reason For this self AUTOPSY

Write and Live.